Stress – that’s a fucking understatement, if you ask me. When stress causes headaches that make you nauseous and are a constant dull pain thumping through your head and behind one eye, it’s pretty clear that the stress level is really HIGH.
I really don’t like whining. This is more along the lines of bitching, which is entirely different, so get the whiney voice you think you hear out of your head. That’s not me. I only whine when I’m really sick or in a great deal of pain and have someone here to take care of me – yeah, just like a man. By the way, I have a super high pain tolerance, so what hurts me may have you crippling over and reaching for the oxycontin.
After countless applications, I have had two interviews. Yes, that’s right, TWO fucking interviews over a period of – what’s it been – eight months! This is ridiculous, and stupid, and assinine, and whatever else you can fit in here that’s appropriate. A big fat WHAT THE FUCK? here. Banks and car corporations get bailouts, and yet GM is still filing for bankruptcy. Excuse me? Does that mean I can have my Solstice now, since I’m a tax-paying citizen and I now would own part of the company, right? I’ll take one in charcoal grey or black, please. Thank you. It can be delivered to my house, but make it soon because I don’t know how much longer I’m gonna be here – you know, because I’m losing that, too, thanks to this wonderful fucking economy and predatory lenders.
Don’t get on me about the bankruptcy thing. It’s called sarcasm.
And that’s just the job front part of my stress. Can you say “Pissed Off”? Yes, I’m sure you can.
I’ve completed my book Nemesis, which has me elated, and I’m working on the query letter now and will begin the dreaded synopsis soon. Writers understand what I mean by “dreaded”. We hate writing them. They’re evil, horrible, despicable things, and I curse agents who ask for them. That’s right, I’m cursing you – a thousand plagues upon your head! Just like the one I’m dealing with right now. HA!
So, you’re wondering where the stress is here, right? Today is June 1st. Summer is beginning. What does that mean in the publishing industry? A lot of agents, editors, and all sorts of publishing folks go on vacations during the summer. September is a big month for sales. I’m trying to finish this shit up so I can query the hell out of this book by the end of this week so I don’t have to wait all summer while they’re on vacation.
Can you say “Do I really NEED to sleep?” That way, I can also get this editing job done, and rewrite four of my articles that were finally looked at that I should have gotten paid for last week. When you change to a new system, especially an online one, please make sure it’s working properly. *rolls eyes*
And let’s talk about my wonderful nocturnal sleep schedule that is driving me to the brink of insanity. I’m falling asleep now AFTER the sun rises and waking up around 4 or 5 PM. How exactly am I supposed to look for a job when I’m sleeping during normal business hours? Yes, makes it rather difficult to do this, and yet I cannot seem to change it no matter how hard I try.
Also, having a conversation with my ex-fiance right now about our situation is not the most conducive plan to getting rid of the headache. However, I’ve just asked him to re-hang the heavy bag, because if I don’t get some sort of release soon, oh I’ll be famous all right – after I’ve killed someone… or several people.
Okay, I think I’ve bitched enough today. I have work to do now. Thanks for listening to my vent.
2 thoughts on “My Life in Hell: Stress”
I’m so sorry to hear of your situation. My husband has had one interview since he was laid off and they didn’t hire him because he talked too much about fucking ART. It sucks. I hope this shit improves soon. maybe we can start promoting your old books. Have you thought of Kindle or Scribd?
My dear friend, I am so sorry you have been under such stress lately.
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