Tag Archives: Zombie Survival Crew

IronE’s Autobiography & Cover Reveal

Posted on by Jinxie G

IronE Singleton, aka T-Dog on The Walking Dead, has co-written his official autobiography with ZSC Commander-in-Chief Juliette Terzieff .

After a long wait, we finally have news about the book…and the cover!

BookCover_FrontFinal(1)

Synopsis:

On the streets of Atlanta, the fight to survive is a daily battle.

From the drug-infested corners of one of the city’s worst housing projects, to alleyways filled with ravenous zombies– Blindsided by the Walking Dead examines one man’s battle to overcome the violence, drugs, and crime of the ‘hood; starting with a young IronE Singleton determined to succeed despite an abusive mother, an absent father, and the temptations of instant gratification inherent with the thug life.

Football and Faith in God become IronE’s allies in his quest to escape and help him reach for the lights of the University of Georgia’s football field and theater stages.

After years of struggle–failed businesses, small roles, and an ill-fated trip to Los Angeles–IronE snags his major breakthrough role, playing the kind of drug-dealing, gun-toting thug he would have become on the streets, in The Blind Side.

When he is cast as T-Dog on AMC’s international mega-hit “The Walking Dead”, IronE examines through art what humanity is about and what it means to truly survive against all odds. Alongside cast mates Michael Rooker, Norman Reedus, Jeffrey DeMunn, and Andrew Lincoln, IronE fought, gagged, and sweat his way into the hearts and minds of millions around the world.

Available for pre-order now!

Get your order in now!

ZSC’s Big Cover Reveal

Posted on by Jinxie G

It’s finally that time of year again, where the Zombie Survival Crew unveils its latest anthology…and I’m in it this time! But here, I’ll let Juliette tell you all about the book and how to pre-order before the big cover reveal:

From the mobile unit of ZSC Commander-in-Chief Juliette Terzieff:

After months of anticipation, the day has finally come when we can release the cover art for Undead Uncensored, the second Zombie Survival Crew anthology. This year’s anthology is a vibrant collection of short fiction, poetry and non-fiction pieces designed to help you get your zombie freak on and prepare for what we might all face if the zombipocalypse hits!

Undead Uncensored features the work of yours truly alongside other ZSC Commanders: actor Michael Rooker, award-winning author LK Gardner-Griffie, and authors Jinxie G, R.C. Murphy, and Amy Sundberg. ZSC crew members, including Wendy Sparrow, Jessica Capelle, Robin Sellman, Amber Revelt, Stephanie Allen, Christopher De Voss, and many others contributed their artistic endeavors to this creeptastic collection!

Undead Uncensored is already available for pre-order here and orders will begin shipping on December 1, 2012.

Now without further ado… (yes, you can stop holding your breath now)

The cover for Undead Uncensored…

Go pre-order this, bitches! There’s some fun tales awaiting you inside!

Interviewed by a Vampire – R.C. Murphy

Posted on by Jinxie G

Darling minions, please welcome author R.C. Murphy to My Reality today. She has a new book out (and it’s awesome) that she’s promoting, and my vamp Shawn has decided he’d like to interview her. He usually interviews the authors around here, though it’s been quite a while. You’ve never truly been interviewed, unless by a vampire.

Shawn, go ahead and take over . . . the interview.

*laughs* You’d better clarify that shit ’cause you know what’ll happen. *clears throat* R.C. Murphy . . . oh hey lady, I know you! I’ve got some shit for you to answer, so let’s get started.

First question: Mind if I call you Nee? I kinda dig that nickname. *grins*

N: Everyone likes that name. Go ahead.

S: Thanks. So, Nee, what kinds of books do you write? Y’know, genre and shit. And do you read the same stuff you write?

N: I write paranormal romance, usually. I tried to keep it urban fantasy, but those pesky sex scenes keep sneaking in. A lot of the short stories I’ve written lately are straight-up horror. Those are the most fun, to be honest.

I read a variety of books, ranging from research materials to high fantasy. Typically, if I am in the middle of writing, I try to avoid reading paranormal romance so I don’t accidentally borrow from what I’m reading. That being said, I make an exception for certain favorite authors.

S: Ooh, paranormal romance! I like that shit. *arches brow* Don’t judge. I like what you’ve done with your vamps. Pretty fucking cool. I also hear that Umi approves. There’s a great nod for ya. What was your inspiration for the story, or how’d it come about?

N: I’ve always toyed around with a vampire book in some form. The book I just released, Be Ours Forever, came from a writing challenge that my friend Quamaine gave me. His challenge didn’t include vampires, but I used them to give myself familiar footing to tackle a situation I hadn’t delved into before, a romance between two men and a woman that wasn’t a typical love triangle.

S: Well, ya did a good job, darlin’. Why do you write that shit . . . I mean, I’m not calling it shit, per se, but why do you write in general? What motivates or inspires you to write or is inspiration for your stories?

N: Ha ha! Don’t worry, on hard days I tell myself, “This shit is hard!”

I write because otherwise the ideas drive me insane. It’s in my DNA to create something, somehow and writing just happened to be the right outlet for the creative urges.

Inspiration comes from observing the world–I do a lot of people watching. Something simple, like a couple arguing in the car at a stoplight, can trigger an idea. Other times the ideas come to me in dreams. Yeah, it sounds cheesy as hell, but some of my best characters started out that way.

S: *nods* Ah yes, good answer. I read everything Jinxie reads (obviously, though I try to ignore some of it), and her TBR pile is fucking HUGE. She just finished reading the graphic novel Witch Doctor, Vol. 1: Under the Knife, which is . . . well, I’ll let you read the review. Can you name any books (stand alone or series) that you absolutely HAD to read the moment you saw it?

N: Larissa Ione’s Demonica series hit my radar hard. A friend suggested it and when I went to the store to pick up a copy, I stood in the aisle for a while reading the first few pages and was hooked.

The rest of the stuff I read right now are all things that my mother, of all people, suggests. Or rather, she shoves them at me and says, “Trust me, you’ll like this.” Between all of my writing projects, I don’t have time to browse through bookstores. Luckily, Mom and I share similar tastes in novels.

S: How do you feel about fangs? *winks and flashes fang*

N: Fangs are sexy. Especially that moment when they first touch skin. A brush of danger. The knowledge that death is right there, ready to clamp down on your throat . . . .

Oh dear, I think I delved too far into that one.

S: You and me can delve into that one later. *winks* Can you give our readers any hints as to what’s in store for future books?

N: I can give a few hints, but not too many. That would spoil the fun.

My current work in progress is a novel called Enslaved. Take everything you may know about an incubus and turn it on its head. I’ve created a whole new origin for the incubi. There is a preview for Enslaved in the back of Be Ours Forever. *hint*

After that, I’m revisiting the Be Ours Forever universe for a prequel novella. This one will feature Jarlan and Meghan . . . and a basement. I can’t wait to write that one. It should be fun.

S: Sounds like it would be. So let’s wrap this up and you can show me around this beautiful home, okay? Particularly, your cave. *waggles eyebrows* Tell all the peeps for me, Nee, where to buy your shit . . . er . . . I mean book. *grins*

N: You would want to peek into my cave, Shawn.

Folks can pick up copies of my book at the following sites:

In paperback – http://amzn.com/147822150X
Kindle – http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008S2D9J6
Nook – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/be-ours-forever-rc-murphy/1112317879?ean=2940044726536
All Romance eBooks – http://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-beoursforever-904951-139.html

S: Thanks, Nee, for sitting through this wonderful interview with me. I’ve really enjoyed your lovely company. *winks*

N: Flattery will get you nowhere with me, Shawn. I have a lot of smooth talking bad boys in my head, it makes me immune to your charm.

S: Uh huh. Right. They ain’t me.

N: Thank you for taking the time to do this. We’ll have to do it again soon.

Abso-fucking-lutely! Alright, folks, go check out Nee’s . . . I mean, R.C. Murphy’s awesome vampire book Be Ours Forever. See that? It’s a VAMPIRE book. I like that kinda shit because, y’know, I’m a fucking vampire. *flashes fang* Oh, and it has sex in it, just so ya know. I don’t wanna hear none of you complainin’ that I didn’t warn you.

*head desk* Um, thanks Shawn, I think. I’ll take over again. And thank you R.C. Murphy for having the courage to deal with my most troublesome vamp! I think I owe you a cookie . . . or three.

You can find R.C. Murphy on her blog The Path of a Struggling Writer, Facebook, and she’s a co-Commander on the Zombie Survival Crew, where she blogs weekly and has written stories for their anthologies.

That Feeling…

Posted on by Jinxie G

…when even though you’re surrounded by people, you feel utterly alone.

Ever feel like that?

It’s been almost 20 years since I’ve been without a dog in the house. Twenty. Fucking. Years. I can’t even really begin to describe how it feels aside from the statement above. I miss my Moonbug, my K’Lar, my MacLeod, my Scully…my Leo, who’s still alive but I’ll never see him again. Not having a dog in my house is a whole new kind of loneliness I’ve only ever felt once in my life. It’s torment.

But there’s more…

It has now been almost one week since I quit smoking. Yeah, I know. Yay for me. Woo-hoo. Go Jinxie! That’s not how I feel, though. I started smoking (cloves) when I was 15. A year later, I moved to cigarettes. Not sure why, but I did. I hate the taste and smell of cigarettes, but I like smoking. Yes, that’s damn weird for someone who’s smoked for nearly 30 years. I’ve quit at least 3 times. Once for 2 years. I can’t even remember why I started again, except for the last time. That was when I had the miscarriage. That life-altering event amongst many life-altering events that have warped my life into something unrecognizable.

And they would, because I certainly do most of the time…when I can actually see the stars.

But wait, there’s more…

I had a breakdown on Saturday morning. I hadn’t had one of those in a while, so I guess it was due, but still. Damn. It was a conglomeration of every single damn thing that is happening to me. Those two things above. The constant pain. The fatigue. I’m fucking tired, people.

Regardless of the feeling alone, of the pain, of the fatigue, of feeling like a failure at times because I’m 43 and so NOT where I wanted to be at this age…I said many years ago that I wanted to retire by 40. This is NOT the kind of retirement I was talking about…but regardless of all of it, I still somehow push forward with a strength I don’t understand, my grandfather’s words echoing in my head…

You’re strong enough for this, for what’s coming

What the FUCK does that mean, gramps? Honestly. Could you be any more vague?

At any rate, I still push forward, working out, trying to eat better, not smoking so I don’t die in 10 years, working on getting Running Ink Press somewhere so I have a legacy to give to no one, do whatever I can for Zombie Survival Crew, do the ghostwriting, and somewhere in the midst of all of that I try to find time to work on my own goddamn books…through the pain and the fog and the fatigue.

But I’m still really fucking tired, and there are some days when I just don’t want to get out of bed because what’s the point? Really. I hate feeling like this, and it’s not the first time I’ve been here. Though I haven’t quite fallen into the well again, so that’s a good start. For the past 20 years, those dogs have gotten me out of bed.

Now, I do it all for Umi, though I really wish I could do more for her. That’s when I feel like a failure. When I ask that question, “What the fuck is my purpose here if I can’t DO anything in this condition?”

I write, yes. That doesn’t require physical exertion, thank the gods, but it does require a clear mind. When the fog isn’t there, I create worlds, destroy some of them, kill people who piss me off, bring people together…make you laugh, cry, jump out of your seat or throw the book across the room. I make my worlds real for you so when you read them, they punch you in the gut when you close the book, because then it’s over and you don’t want it to end.

You have no idea how much I live in those worlds, because reality bites.

But I still need to make money, to work a job (if I can find one), just like the rest of the world. And physically, I can’t do most jobs anymore. So, writing, it is. That’s how I have to make a living, folks. When you buy a book from RIP, I get a percentage of that. Same with ZSC. When you buy my jewelry or crafts, I get most of that. This is all I have left. That’s not meant to guilt you into buying something. It just is. This is how I live now.

It’s depressing. It’s daunting. It’s fucking stupid that I’ve been placed in this position, and it makes me wonder if I asked to be challenged far beyond that which I ever have in any other lifetime. Seriously. My life has been a series of road blocks.

I know we make our own destiny. I’m trying to carve mine, but sometimes, you don’t get all the tools you need to carve that path, so you have to improvise. Mostly, it just pisses me off that some people are handed every tool necessary and the rest of us have to figure shit out on our own.

I guess I should take a clue from my K’Lar….

…and always look over the edge.

Opportunities lie in wait in the oddest of places.

You have no idea how high that cliff was. She scared the hell out of me that day, even though I stopped freaking out long enough to snap this photo. K’Lar was damn bold for her 65 lbs.

I should be more like her.

I have a hammer, a chisel, and some rope for getting down that cliff, and I’ll be carving my own path from this point forward, because I’m fucking tired of playing by everybody else’s rules. I WILL be releasing two vamp books this year, and possibly another book. And nothing is going to stop me short of death!

Spam Comment – 25 June 2012

Posted on by Jinxie G

Hey, minions! I barely skimmed this one and thought it was perfect before I even realized which post it was on, which makes it even more perfect. HA!

Today’s spam comment comes from piscine bois tonga, and was  left on . . . wait for it . . . Zombieland. When you read below, you’ll understand why this is just too awesome for words:

hello!,I love your writing very much! percentage we keep up a correspondence more about your post on AOL? I require a specialist in this space to solve my problem. May be that’s you! Having a look ahead to look you.

Well, piscine . . . wait, may I call you piscine, or should I go with tonga? *waves hand* Whatever. I was wrong (<—- yes, gentlemen, I just said that. I actually do admit when I’m wrong) about this being too awesome for words because I actually do have some words. I’m glad you love my writing so much,  piscine, but no, we cannot correspond via AOL, and I’ll tell you why. I don’t have AOL. I haven’t had AOL in YEARS, like since it first came out. I consider AOL a virus, much like Internet Explorer and a multitude of other programs forced onto your computer when you buy it. Do you have any idea how long I’ve been on the Internet, piscine? Of course not, because you don’t know me. I’ve been online since the early 90s. That’s correct, a long fucking time (tomorrow, we’ll discuss my swearing on here). Obviously, if you’re on AOL, of course you’re having an issue with whatever it is you’re needing help with, because being on AOL means you don’t know how to work any other browser . . . or you’re afraid of change, like my ex-fiance. He’s got AOL. Maybe you could talk to him, though I doubt he’d be of much help to you, seeing as how you’re both on AOL and neither of you seems to know jack about computers.

Also, it slays me (yes, I said it) that you require a zombie specialist, since you posted on my review of a zombie movie, and isn’t today your lucky day? Go on, ask me why. Go on. *nudges* Okay, okay, okay . . . I just so happen to be one of the top seven Commanders of the Zombie Survival Crew. Yep. You bet your ass, I am. So perhaps, if you’re having a zombie-related issue, I can help you. Oh, you’re not? Well, crap, piscine. What the hell do you want then?

Oh, I don’t think so . . . .

But while you’re looking ahead to look me . . . is that some sort of futuristic thing? Or wait, maybe YOU are a zombie, piscine! *draws weapon* Come to think of it, your comment looks like it was written by a zombie.

*fires bolt*

Hmm . . . whoopsie! Piscine wasn’t a zombie, but hey, that’s one less spammer in the world. Perhaps they should have worn this shirt…

Click on the image to view the actual shirt

You’re welcome!

 

Birthday Wish List

Posted on by Jinxie G

Yes, I’d really LOVE to have this cake!

“It’s my birthday and I’ll sing if I want to…”

I’ve had a few people ask me what I want for my birthday. My first response is, of course, to sell LOTS of books. That’s a given any day of the year, though, so I decided that since tomorrow is my birthday, I’d make a wish list:

1) Donate to Defenders of Wildlife

2) An eReader (doesn’t have to be a fancy new one, but all of my books are on Kindle for PC right now, so a Kindle would be kinda cool)

3) A new laptop!!!!!!! *gets on knees and begs* PLEASE! (If this bitch dies, I’m out of work and can’t write/edit)

4) Game of Thrones: Season 1 DVD set (so I can waste more time, but more importantly, so Umi can watch it)

5) Tires for my truck (I know that’s expensive, but asphalt hits over 200 degrees in summer here and those bitches are going to pop soon)

6) The Walking Dead: Season 2 DVD set (is this even out yet?)

7) Donate to Water.org because there are a lot of people in the world who need clean water

8) Whatever it will take to stop the pain I’m in every day

9) To take an awesome trip somewhere cool with a bunch of close friends (what do you mean I’ve already done that? I don’t want to WORK during the trip!)

10) BMW 765Li (it is tradition in my family to always include at least ONE completely out of reach present, but if you want to buy me a car, I’d take a Ford Fusion or Chevy Cruze)

11) Diamonds (what can I say? I’m a girl)

12) That fucking birthday cake in the picture above! I’m serious!

13) The ability to stop time for as long as I need to get certain things done….without aging!

There you go. :D


On Careers & Working

Posted on by Jinxie G

Sometimes, my bite is worse than my bark. *grins*

I have spent more than half of my life working, and I’m what some would call a “Jill of all trades” because of the diversity of jobs I’ve held, from manufacturing to bartending to secretarial to computer lab technician to behavioral health paraprofessional. Not so different from most of the American population. I did not consider any of these jobs careers because they weren’t careers. They were jobs. J-O-Bs to get me through life for a while. Could some of them have turned into careers? Absolutely. But they didn’t because Life happens, that little fucking bitch.

Then I went to school. I got my A.A. degree, and now I’m five classes away from a Bachelor’s degree in English that I can’t currently finish because, well, that bitch called Life is getting in the way again, even as much as I’m trying to push her the fuck out of the way.

Originally, I was going to be a high school English teacher. I worked for a school district for seven years, got sick of the administration and bullshit red tape, and changed my mind. Now my degree is just a fucking personal goal. Doesn’t matter because I could still use it, if I can ever finish the damn thing. If I ever do finish and go on to get my Master’s degree in English Literature, I’ll consider teaching college.

But my writing . . . now that’s my career. If it were just a hobby, I wouldn’t have started a magazine and publishing company with my friend Sharon. The jewelry? That’s the goddamn hobby, not a career. It’s called extra cash. The artwork you’ll soon see at cons for Zombie Survival Crew? Hobby, not career. But the Zombie Survival Crew itself? Fucking future income and career, bitches.

My passion for writing is my career, regardless of how much or little I’ve accomplished thus far. I have released three books, started a literary magazine in 2008 and a publishing company at the end of 2010. I was a finalist in a pitch contest a few years ago, but didn’t have my head on straight enough to finish the book and send it to the literary agent who chose me (I know, stupid); however, I just entered that book into a major contest, and I also entered a short story into another contest. Both have cash prizes and publishing potential. Could I have done more over the past few years? Oh yeah, without question. But Life has a way of fucking things up for you now and then. However, I will tell you that I’ve completed at least six novels, one of which I released last year. –>

At least two more novels will release this year; one paranormal and the other contemporary romance.

What have you done lately?

Online Dating…Still?

Posted on by Jinxie G

I don’t even know what fucking week this is now, but my subscription to the dating site ends on March 4. I will not be renewing it for several reasons. That said, just as I’d given up on the stupid site, a new guy came out of left field at me two weeks ago. Seriously. Totally caught me off guard and I pulled a Keanu Reeves because I was like “Whoa!”

Yeah, I know, bad joke. It’s not meant for you; it’s meant for him because he hates Keanu Reeves. Annnnnnd moving forward…

And you know what? He’s really tall and hella funny and damn cute. I’m hoping he’s not a serial killer because he really likes Dexter, but then again, so do I. =D Hmm…

I’ve had three dates with him so far and have enjoyed myself immensely. Chivalry is NOT dead, ladies. I know, I’m in shock too. No, I’m not telling you about my dates, but if you’d been paying attention to Twitter or Facebook last week, you would have caught some of it. =)

Umi said recently, “It’s nice to see you smiling again.” Um, yeah. That says a lot.

Also? I’ve totally found my zombie apocalypse survival partner!!!

He has ZOMBIE AMMO, people!!! \m/ (^-^) \m/

Happy New Year, 2012!

Posted on by Jinxie G

Bitch, you better be good to me!!!

You know I don’t normally do the New Year’s resolution thing . . . or I make a joke of it . . . but I’m kinda doing one this time just so I can put out there all the shit I have to accomplish this next year for my own damn good.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you my New Year’s resolutions, not in any particular order. Start thinking of yours because I’m going to ask you what they are at the end of this.

1) Quit smoking by my 43rd birthday.

This is imperative because if I don’t do it, I’ll die at age 53. Yes, I know when I’m going to die. Haven’t we covered this already? I come from a very psychic family, people. And it’s true, most psychics won’t tell you when you’re going to die, but I’m weird and am one of likely a few people in the world who can handle the information without freaking the fuck out. I only pray that once I quit, I NEVER pick up a cigarette again. If I can accomplish that, I’ll live to the ripe old age of 79. Obviously, I’m hoping for the latter, because 10 years just isn’t enough fucking time for all the shit I have to do!

2) Quit drinking soda altogether.

I can do this. I’ve quit drinking it before, but obviously not altogether. The issue is that I freakin’ LOVE the taste of Pepsi, damn it. Why must you be so bad for my waistline?! And my waistline is right where it all goes. *sigh* Which brings us to my next resolution…

3) Join a gym.

I know everyone and their fucking mother adds this to their resolutions list, but I actually mean it. I miss the gym and haven’t had the ability to go over the last couple of years. And I know I’m insane for saying this, but I miss the elliptical. It actually helped my lower back and hip. Perhaps not to the point where I can ever work a 9 to 5 job again, but certainly at least giving me a better quality of life than lying around the fucking house because I can’t move.

4) Get my damn passport!

I don’t know yet why this is important for 2012, but I’m spending the money on this because it’s long overdue. I have places I want to go, and even if I don’t get to those places in 2012, I just might in 2013 because let’s face it, folks, the world isn’t fucking ending on 12-21-2012. I hate to tell you this, but I know the world won’t end in my lifetime. Just sayin’.

5) Take Umi someplace special.

Just because she fucking deserves it after taking care of me for most of my life, and well, because she’s my mom.

6) Start working on my “Payback is a Bitch and Bitch, I am” plan.

Sorry, this is classified information. But I promise you’ll be told after the fact!

7) Change my diet altogether.

It’s not like I eat junk food or fast food, but I could add healthier things to our diet, since y’know, I’m the damn chef in this house. And if Victoria (executive chef extraordinaire and now my dietitian) ever sends me her massive missive of recipes, I’ll get right on that!

8) Create a freakin’ work schedule!

Between RIP and ZSC and my own personal writing (which suffers the most), I’m being pulled in multiple directions and don’t even have time to beta read or critique for my own RIP partner, let alone others, which is so not cool with me! And how am I supposed to get my name out there if I can’t work on my own writing? It can’t happen, people. You need books to read from me! And I need to get the next Kick-Ass Girls Club book written before some of you start stalking me! LOL

9) Move Umi, Moon, and myself into a HOUSE.

I’m so done with apartment living. I’ll consider making the move back east after that.

10) Moonbug…

Speaking of Moon, she and I need to start walking farther. It’ll be better for both of us, but mostly it’s good for her to work those back legs.

11) Stop drinking coffee.

Wait! I know this sounds absolutely INSANE, but I need to kick the caffeine habit as well. This will be the very last thing I give up, simply for the fact that I will likely be in the mood to kill people after quitting smoking and drinking soda. However, in the instance the Zombiepocalypse happens, all bets are off!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

And…. *drum roll* ….What are your New Year’s resolutions, dear readers? C’mon, don’t be afraid to comment. *points to note* See? I’m a comment whore.  I WANT you to comment, damn it.

 

#HorrorHound – Behind the Scenes: Part Four

Posted on by Jinxie G

Okay, the HorrorHound section is over, so technically, this is just me babbling about what happened the following week. Let’s see if I can remember it all, now that it’s after Christmas and this happened before Thanksgiving.

I last left you with My “son,” my wonderful trip to Maryland, and then back home to Arizona.

My “son”

Though I have never given birth to a child, I have many children. I have been a foster mother to a teenage girl, and kind of a mom to some of her friends. I’d attempted to give my nieces some semblance of a normal life outside of their home. I have been the mother figure for several of the Native American kids I used to work with when I was a Life Skills Coach/Mentor. But there is one person in particular, whom I’ve known since he was in middle school, and he was a part of the Writer’s Club I sponsored at the school. I love him as though he were my own for reasons only a parent could comprehend, and I’ve told him on many occasions that if I’d ever had a son, I would have wanted my son to be just like him. And this is why I call him my “son.” Online, I call him Pasha, and yes, he’s the one who had throat cancer a while back.

Pasha is on the ASU Quidditch team. Yes, there are actually Quidditch teams at universities across the United States and in other countries, and they run with a broom between their legs and the snitch is an actual person. It’s hysterical. Anyway, while I was in Cincinnati, Pasha was in New York for the Quidditch World Cup. I know, I know, it really does sound insane, and if Quidditch is real, where in the fuck is Hogwarts, damn it, and why didn’t I get a letter?! I don’t wear the talisman of the sacred three for just decoration, people. So, ASU came in 19th out of 92, or something like that. I’ve yet to have a chance to watch a Quidditch match or practice, so I’ll have to remedy that next season, but I just wanted to point it all out to you because I think it’s cool as hell and this is my “son” we’re talking about, so I have to gush. Oh, and his entire next semester is taking place on a cruise ship as he travels around the world, or at least South America. :D I’m so proud.

Maryland

After stuffing the backseat with Lora, Juliette, and ALL of Juliette’s clothes, thereby burying the both of them, we spent the 9-ish-hour trek driving to Baltimore, or at least to a place very near Baltimore. Paul drove, and I got the front passenger seat because I get car sick on long rides in the backseat. I wish I could claim it’s just an excuse, but no, it’s unfortunately very true. When that happens, I’m useless for at least two days.

Paul decided, at the beginning of our drive, to play a game. I’d never played this game before, so I was intrigued. The idea was to name a movie that started with the last letter of the movie previously named. I don’t think I need to explain it other than that, and for a majority of the ride, it was just Paul and me playing.

We played this game ALL THE WAY to Lora’s house. I’m not kidding. Near the end, it was damn difficult to think of movie titles.

Tuesday morning, I woke up to the most beautiful sight when I looked out of Lora’s front window.

And I saw an even more beautiful sight when I walked out the back door…

That’s Lora’s backyard and how fucking gorgeous is that? Look, it’s FALL! We don’t have this where I live, unless you drive up to the mountains.

Juliette and I spent the week at Lora’s, working, shopping, working, going out to dinner, working……..do you sense a theme here? Yeah, Juliette worked my ass off. :p I can’t even tell you how many survival bracelets I made, but I ran out of black paracord. Actually, I made one of each brigade color in one of four sizes, so….32. I wrote posts for ZSC. I fixed some bios on the ZSC site. I got some ghostwriting done. And Juliette got the inventory sorted and into new plastic bins. All in all, I/we got quite a bit of work done before watching The Walking Dead, The Talking Dead, and Terra Nova.

The dinner out was at Outback, which I haven’t had in a long damn time, but holy hell, was that sangria awesome! So much so that I had two! And all three of us were so hungry we devoured the appetizer, the bread, and everything on our plates.

Lora and Juliette bought me these AWESOME shoes!!! They truly appreciate my shoe whore addiction.

Thank you, ladies. Sincerely.

I also made spaghetti for them one night. :) It turned out pretty good.

During my week in Baltimore-ish, it rained, then it dropped to below freezing after the storms left, and then it rained again. One day, it was 65 degrees. WTF? Isn’t this November in Maryland? Why is it Arizona weather? Regardless, I loved it! Part of me wished it had snowed while I was there. Part of me was thankful it didn’t because I certainly didn’t have the shoes for THAT.

Home

I left Baltimore at 4am on a train to Boston, since that’s where my flight was leaving from. We’d cancelled our ZSC trip to Boston, but it would cost too much to change the flight, so we opted for the train ticket instead. Actually, I’d never been on a train before, so I was kind of excited.

I know, now y’all think I’m sheltered or something, don’t you? LOL

I had a 7-hour train-ride to Boston, a 3-hour wait at the Boston airport before my flight left (thank God for Starbucks), which was heading to Atlanta. Don’t ask.

When I first scheduled these damn flights, they were non-stop from Phoenix to Dayton, and from Boston to Phoenix. I don’t think the fucking airline should be allowed to change that on a person.

My flight arrived late, so we left Boston about 45 minutes late. Landed in Atlanta late–another goddamn mile-long between concourses airport–and I took the tram this time, the moving walkways, and practically ran to my gate (which I really can’t do) to discover they were already boarding. I barely made it, and I’d like to thank all the jackasses on the previous flight for listening to the captain and allowing those of us who had connecting flights to deplane first (not). This is why I fucking hate people. Most of you don’t think about anyone but yourselves. Not you, dear blog reader. I mean that “you” in general–as in the general population. This is why I love apocalyptic stories, especially those movies that show the apocalypse actually happening.

I’ll let your imagination fly from there.

I boarded the plane and the plane finally taxied out to the runway. You know how when you’re sitting there before take-off, waiting your turn, and you hear and feel the engines basically shut down and start back up? Yeah, so the captain and his crew do that…and suddenly the a/c isn’t working anymore. He gets on the com to inform us that there’s a problem and we have to go back to the gate so maintenance can take a look because he doesn’t want to take any chances. I’m so more than cool with that because I really don’t feel like being in a plane crash. Captain takes us back to the gate, and then proceeds to explain to us, after he’s walked around the plane–I saw him outside my window–what exactly is going on. And I mean EXACTLY. At this point, we’ve been sitting at the gate for about an hour. I’ve still got my hoodie on, which my neighbor helped me pull off because a 6ft. Amazon sitting in a tiny coach seat on a plane isn’t going to have the room to do such a thing. El Capitan comes back on the com, explaining why we couldn’t take off–there was a valve that stayed open and apparently, if it had stayed closed, we’d have been able to take off, but since it stayed open, we couldn’t. Hey, I had to suffer through the much longer version of that, so be thankful I gave you the summary. Anyway, Captain Jack (or whatever his name was) explains–as we’re all wiping sweat from our brows–that the problem would affect the a/c so it wasn’t working…

Now, I have very little patience for stupidity and being talked to like I’m a child. I don’t need things explained to me in detail. I don’t give a fuck that there are approximately 250-some-odd other people on the plane. Perhaps they need it explained in detail. Or perhaps Captain Whats-his-name is a newbie at this, which does NOT instill my confidence whatsoever in him flying me to Phoenix. Regardless, me, being the smartass I am and having been traveling since 3am and it’s now 8:30pm–yes, that’s right, as my plane was now an hour late from departing–I decide to answer the pilot without thinking about it and completely forgetting I’m kind of half deaf because my ear buds are in my ears.

PILOT: “So the air-conditioning is out…”

ME *very loudly*: “No shit.”

BACK HALF OF THE PLANE: *raucous laughter*

ME: “As if sweating wasn’t a clue.”

PEOPLE SURROUNDING ME: *laughing harder*

Older guy in front of me says something hysterical, along the lines of my sarcasm, but I can’t remember what it was.

PILOT: “But we’re about finished here…and once they’re done…well…we should be on our way.”

ME: “Is he new at this?”

NEIGHBOR: *laughing* “Seriously.”

PILOT SAYS SOMETHING ELSE IDIOTIC.

ME: “Are you fucking kidding me? Are we children?”

NEIGHBORS LAUGH AND COMMENT.

ME: “I’m sorry. I’m tired and just want to go home. I’ve been traveling since 3am.”

GUY IN FRONT OF ME: *turns around and waves his hand while laughing* “Don’t worry about it.”

PILOT: “And we’re ready to depart again.”

ME: “Thank the gods.”

PEOPLE SURROUNDING ME: *raucous laughter*

I’ll not bore you with the rest of my remarks, but know that as we took off, I wanted to shout something along the lines of “And we’re airborne! Duh!” and when we landed, I really wanted to yell out something to the passengers on the plane along the lines of “Welcome to the desert. Earlier in our flight, you’ve already experienced the weather. Enjoy!”

*sigh*

And so, my darling cousin Skywise had to pick me up–an hour late–and I finally made it home, whereupon I sat and told Umi the ENTIRE day.

Yeah.

***Note: I’ll try to get a recipe post up this week, but my phone isn’t working right now–which is where all the pictures for said recipe are–and I can’t get it to talk to my laptop, so it may have to wait a week. This is also the reason I can’t add some of the other pictures I took during my travels. Oh well.